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You don’t have to be single if you don’t want to be, Loriann.

But if you won’t go outside your comfort zone, I can pretty much assure you that nothing’s going to change.

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I am 44 years old and entering the dating scene again for the first time in 25 years. I am not doing the online singles sites…that is just scary to me. I am new in town, with a few happily married friends. So much of my time was taken up with caring for someone else that now I just don’t know how to fill that time. Thanks for highlighting an important principle for women over 40 seeking love: You will not find it unless you do something differently. It’s called Match.com, it’s open 24 hours a day, and it costs a lot less than getting on a plane and hoping to sit next to a 45-year-old eligible bachelor.

I have four grown who are trying to set me up (I love them, but what a nightmare!! I highly suggest you get over your fear of online dating, not because it’s perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but because it’s ubiquitous and effective in creating opportunity.

There a couple of things one can do to meet people, particularly if over 40. Eat out, grab coffee, and hang out at different places each week.

Go to any party you're invited to, join clubs with people who do what you like to do, volunteer, get involved socially. As a dating coach, I know that people resist it because they're scared to try something so unfamiliar to them.

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